Your majesty I have a confession my secret I must now betray I was not a born fool it took work to get this way. When I was a lad I was gloomy and sad And I was from the day I was born, When other lads giggled and gurgled and wiggled I proudly was loudly forlorn. My friends and my family looked at me clammily, Thought there was something amiss. When others found various antics hilarious All I could manage was this hoo hoo Or this Boo hoo Or this Waahhh. My father he shouted 'He needs to be clouted His teeth on a wreath I'll hand him!' My mother she cried as she rushed to my side 'You're a brute and you don't understand him!' So they send for a witch with a terrible twitch, To ask how my future impressed her She took one look at me and cried 'Hehehehehe, he? What else could he be but a jester?' A jester, a jester? A funny idea a jester. No butcher no baker no candlestick maker And me with the look of a fine undertaker Impressed her as a jester? Now where could I learn any comical turn That was not in a book on the shelf? No teacher to take me and mold me and make me A merryman fool or an elf. But I'm proud to recall that in no time at all With no other recourses but my own resources With firm application and determination I made a fool of myself!
(For a jester's chief employment Is to kill himself for your enjoyment And a jester unemployed- is nobody's fool!)